Ever since I started my social media course last September, I have had many experiences of ‘women tribes’. They have come in many forms… course cohorts, networking groups, and workshops.
What I’m talking about here isn’t my usual group of friends… not my ‘girls’ that have known me forever, who have seen me at my best and my worst (which was probably face down pissed up on a pavement in Newquay!). These are women I have never met before, who sometimes live in different parts of the country, come from different walks of life but all thrown together for the same cause.
As you may have read in previous blogs, I have recently started a course involving mindset and how you can up-level your business by getting over your fears and negative thoughts. Last week our cohort of nine, plus our mentor Andrea, had our first Zoom meeting – posh term for ‘a meeting over the internet’!
The conversation involved how we got on with writing ‘Our Story’ (see previous blog) and what our ‘Wins & Stretches’ have been this week. What was so refreshing was to see how everyone was completely honest about how they were feeling. No pretence, no making out everything was great. There were tears and fears laid out for all to see, and whilst there were apologies at first (we are British after all!) this vulnerability was so refreshing and gave us all permission to bear our feelings. This is how you build trust within your ‘Tribe’.
I came to do this course following a workshop I did a couple of months ago. Again, this involved women who, once they all got in a room together, realised they’re not alone in feeling inadequate, not good enough, that they can’t reach their potential and that they’re too fearful to push out of their comfort zone for fear of failure. (Read ‘Yesterday, Three Women Changed My Life’ for more details).
During my six month course with Digital Mums, I was put together with six other women who were taking the journey with me. We would meet over the internet every Thursday evening and talk daily on WhatsApp. The fact that these other women didn’t know me from Adam nor I them, almost gives you permission to be your most honest… almost like a counsellor does.
During the six months of the course, we all went through the ups and downs and we were all there for each other on a daily basis… not only to get through the work that we needed to do to pass, but life in general.
Six months after qualifying, I still talk with my ‘Frida K’ girls daily and we managed to meet up in real life just after we graduated in May. Another meet up is due soon… it’s just a logistical nightmare trying to get seven women free at the same time!
Something really incredible happens when you get a room full of women together… and I don’t mean on a Hen Night!
On Saturday I went to a ‘Colour Me Beautiful’ workshop to support a wonderful lady I have recently met whilst networking. I took a friend along with me and I had met a few of the other ladies there before, but only really as much as ‘what do you do for a living?’. However, once we all got chatting about how we felt about ourselves, there was a shift. There was this ‘green light’ where it was perfectly OK to share our vulnerability.
With all these experiences I have come to realise, that it really doesn’t matter who you are or what your standing is in the community… we are all women going through similar things in our lives and we are best when we support each other, not tear each other down.
So, don’t be afraid to do something outside your comfort zone. Go and meet new people – whether it be at an exercise class, running club, mother and baby group, further education or workshops.
You never know where you might find another ‘Tribe’.
Until next time,
Love and hugs… TOMD xx